Holiday shopping resembling Jingle All the Way is a thing of the past. I recently wrote briefly about my dipping a toe into the world of the competitive sport of Black Friday shopping (NEVER AGAIN!), but internet-sleuthing for the perfect gift is a hoot! Start early, and even if it takes 8 weeks to arrive from the far reaches of the earth, you’re not only covered, you’re gonna nail it come unwrapping time! For me, my hunt began with finding the Keanu Reeves fanatic in my life something they surely don’t already have sitting on their altar. We all know where to turn for one-of-a kind finds (for better or worse). Etsy!
Let’s dive in! Speaking of altars, your pal’s isn’t complete without the Saint Keanu Reeves Prayer Candle from LitWickShop. Described as, “Keanu Reeves, shirtless, holding a puppy. Need we say more? This candle is not only hilarious, but its hot! Literally, and figuratively so please be careful. Any John Wick fan, Bill and Ted, or Matrix fan will love this candle. Our candles are wrapped with high quality vinyl imagery. We know a lot of our items are given as gifts, so we ship as quickly as possible. All items ship within one business day, using 3 day USPS postage.” It’s also scented with True Blood, Harvest Moon, or the prerequisite Pumpkin Chai Latte. Click around that shop; you might check off your whole holiday list. I didn’t know there were folks out there who had a hankering for Jeff Probst merch, clearly I’ve been out-voted. I kill me!
The folks over at LookieLookShop will have your pal travel-ready with their ‘Love, Keanu Cotton Face Mask.’ You know there will be smiles all around, even if they can’t see their faces. Look for the smile crinkles around their eyes, or they might even receive a “Whoa!” Now wouldn’t that make your friend’s airport wait a completely different experience? They might just start a group convo while they eat those Cinnabons.
Or maybe they are an introvert and prefer to have an activity on their flight back. PaperlandOnlineStore has the perfect solution with their Keanu Coloring Book, featuring pages of You’re Breathtaking, The Matrix, Point Break, John Wick 3 and more! I’d snag them some Crayolas or some of those foodish-smelling markers, if you really want to make it a memorable holiday for your friend and all the passengers on the plane. Your Keanu fiend might even give you a completed page to hang on the fridge!
Now this is one of my favorites because of its singular message. StickerNerdz has made it easy to find your people with their ‘Honk if You’d Rather be Watching the 1999 Cinematic Masterpiece The Matrix starring Keanu Reeves & Carrie-Anne Moss – Vinyl Bumper Sticker.’ Dude! I wonder how many honks my pal might be hearing tooling down the road. I might just have to purchase one of my own to complete my experiment. It says it’s low in stock (obviously!), so motor over and grab ’em while the getting’s good!
Alright, you knew things were going to get weird. Does your pal need some Keanu attire to replace their Wyld Stallyns shirt? You know they wouldn’t be caught dead in the generic The Matrix shirts. How long do you think it would take for them to get this tee to the perfect thread-bare coziness we all love? Probably a month. GarishSunCreations has this unique offering, ‘the god Keanu Reeves hug baby Yoda shirt!‘ I’m loving the crossover to rake in the Star Wars folks! This Keanu Reeves / Beatles Mashup Band shirt (hand printed original design) from GnuYorker will definitely bring an eclectic group together on the subway. That sounds like my kind of crowd! Or if the Keanu friend is needing to advertise their partner status, while keeping Keanu abreast of his options, the folks at TSDesignArt have a tee declaring ‘Mentally dating Keanu Reeves.’
Now, if your pockets are a little deeper, and you know your buddy’s shoe size, these ‘Custom Point Break Inspired Black Slip On Black Monochrome Vans (Keanu Reeves / Patrick Swayze)’ from TheBestCustomKicks are showstoppers! These are not your beach Vans; these babies belong on the red carpet! Tell me the neighbors wouldn’t wonder about that dog whistle sound escaping your friend’s mouth, as they discovered what was going to be living on their feet from now on. Even Keanu is a fan! That doesn’t look Photoshopped to me! Again, give those folks a click-around; there are some true gems. I don’t want to get off topic, but two words, Space Balls. That’s all I’m saying!
If your friend needs some cuddle time on the couch while watching their copy of Even Cowgirls Get the Blues on laser disc, MyBestBanner has a John Wick doll that comes complete with puppy. I’m not gonna lie, they are both adorable. They look like they were made lovingly by a true fan. This is another spendier item, but the detail work alone looks like they spent many hours hunkered over their plushie. Click around there, folks. You didn’t think you needed What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? dolls, but after you see them, turns out, you totally do.
You know you’ll need to complete the gift with the gift wrap that will be delicately removed like any respectable grandma would do with CutesyPooSales Keanu Reeves Wrapping Paper. The collage of Keanus would be right at home in a frame hanging next to the aforementioned altar. A gift wrapped in a gift!
And finally, if you are currently skint, I’ve found two companion pieces that will show you are thinking of your special someone, even if you can’t make it for the festivities. Slide this super cute Keanu Reeves tree ornament into a ‘Keanu Reeves BREATHTAKING Card!’ both from CastleMcQuade. The ornament will always have prominent placement on the Christmas tree for years to come. And the card will be hanging on the fridge all year round! I hope I’ve given you some fun ideas to make your friend’s holiday season special. Be excellent to each other!